Sunday, May 30, 2021

Losing Rhett

We lost our beloved Rhett Redbone. He gave us so much love from the first day with his wonderful crooked tooth smile. Rhett you are one of a kind and we are missing you. He had a good death but heartbreaking from Lymphoma.

I learned early one of the myths of loss: "replace the loss." "Next week we will get a new dog." After my grandfather died my parents got me a pony. After another loss another dog. Often after loss or hardship, my go to was to add another animal to my crew. At one point in my life I had 3 cats (Sashie, Smokey, & Pete), 2 large dogs (Max & Loki), 2 birds (Mister and Miss), 3 fish tanks, and pair of frogs. I love my animals and learning good husbandry skills. 

Max and Loki were wonderful friends and companions for 17 years. Without them, I'm not sure I would have made through my grief journey after my immediate families deaths. Walking and caring for them kept me going. After losing Max and Loki, I began fostering dogs because I missed them. To date, I have fostered 11 dogs and have kept three: Tess, Rhett, and Rusty. After Rhett's death I started fostering again... as to keep from getting another dog, yet, give some of the love for Rhett to someone else's something special dog.

I've taken a break from working with grievers to take a breath and work on the tools I give to others for myself. In this time of great loss and grief, self-care should include evaluating the tools you have on board to be resilient.  

Rhett was beloved by all who met him especially Tess. 
If you want to follow the adventures of Tess and her pal Rusty
Instagram @contessaleia

Thank you to Creswell Veterinarian Hospital

 for all your support, advice, and shoulder to cry on.

How Falling in Love is like Owning a Dog

First of all, it’s a big responsibility,
especially in a city like New York.
So think long and hard before deciding on love.

On the other hand, love gives you a sense of security:
when you’re walking down the street late at night
and you have a leash on love
ain’t no one going to mess with you.
Because crooks and muggers think love is unpredictable.
Who knows what love could do in its own defense?

On cold winter nights, love is warm.
It lies between you and lives and breathes
and makes funny noises.
Love wakes you up all hours of the night with its needs.
It needs to be fed so it will grow and stay healthy.

Love doesn’t like being left alone for long.
But come home and love is always happy to see you.
It may break a few things accidentally in its passion for life,
but you can never be mad at love for long.

Is love good all the time? No! No!
Love can be bad. Bad, love, bad! Very bad love.

Love makes messes.
Love leaves you little surprises here and there.
Love needs lots of cleaning up after.
Sometimes you just want to get love fixed.
Sometimes you want to roll up a piece of newspaper
and swat love on the nose,
not so much to cause pain,
just to let love know Don’t you ever do that again!

Sometimes love just wants to go out for a nice long walk.
Because love loves exercise. It will run you around the block
and leave you panting, breathless. Pull you in different directions
at once, or wind itself around and around you
until you’re all wound up and you cannot move.

But love makes you meet people wherever you go.
People who have nothing in common but love
stop and talk to each other on the street.

Throw things away and love will bring them back,
again, and again, and again.
But most of all, love needs love, lots of it.
And in return, love loves you and never stops.

Taylor Mali

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